Three Cheers for China (Pretend Ones)

Boycotting the Olympics is always a good idea as far as I’m concerned. Boycotting the Olympics in order to embarrass China is a really bad idea.

Some people think that a religious dictatorship is preferable to a state-capitalist dictatorship, and those people tend to think that China should grant independence to Tibet and re-install the Dalai Lama. Provided they have done at least a little thinking on the issue, and have not formulated their viewpoint in knee-jerk response to the enormous anti-China propaganda that saturates our media, then I have little to criticize them for.

However, if fans of the Dalai Lama believe that boycotting the Olympics will change anything for Tibet, then I suggest they put on their thinking caps.

Tibetan activists will certainly be punished for trying to politically capitalize on the upcoming Olympics. That is fully guaranteed. The degree to which they will be punished will directly correlate with the degree to which China feels embarrassed, and will be administered mostly after the eyes of the world are no longer on China.

After hammering Tibet with an iron fist, China’s next response to political pressure and threats to boycott the olympics will be to quietly remind world leaders that they hold well over a trillion dollars in American currency and debt. Dumping this currency and debt on the market is what China refers to as the “Nuclear Option”.

If and when China decides to go nuclear in an economic sense, the world economy will be instantly crippled by a worthless American dollar.

Wouldn’t it be a shame if sympathy for a monkey in a purple robe, who preaches peace while on the CIA payroll, and talks about humility while he stays in 5 star hotels, causes China to do something crazy out of sheer frustration?

China wants to be seen as an upstanding member of the world community. For the sake of the way of life we hold dear, I hope that the world gives China its moment of glory, and embraces that country whole-heartedly for two whole weeks.

I don’t care about a sporting ritual during which the world comes together to figure out who the fastest runner is, or what country can drop the best water polo team into the pool. I certainly don’t care about whether or not a religious dictator gets what he wants. I don’t care if the shelves of Walmart are suddenly empty due to a full melt down of the international currency market, thereby rendering blithering yuppie wannabes unable to purchase Chinese made junk.

I just hope that world leaders have an effective emergency plan in place before China throws a tantrum.

I’m not defending China in any way. The fact that the Bush administration with its foolhardy tax cuts for the rich and drunken war spending has placed the world at China’s mercy is deeply regrettable.

The right move would be to slowly and carefully sneak the bullets out of the gun that China has pointed at the world’s head. The wrong move would be to dare China to fire it over something ridiculously unimportant.